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My culture: My style

July 18, 2008

In closing, remember what God said,

Hello everyone, I have been sick with the pain in my head. I suffered massive trauma and head injury from a car accident. In 1992, I had a really bad car accident and it caused me to have symptoms that may in fact be arthritis. No way in fact am I claiming it, but I was on lock down all this week because I had to heal and get better. Nevertheless, I went to my account and I saw a bulletin that made me laugh. Leave it to Mike to keep the party going on, here is a video that he posted. He says it is a game that can be played when you really don’t care about someone in particular of your party. I think we have all had those days when we could smack someone silly. It might make us feel better, but non-violence, consideration and empathy go a much longer way.

Why has the US failed to secure enough resources to protect the peace keeping troups in Afghanistan who face heavy fighting and combat casulaties.

tocks pare losses on reports of Fed offer – Yahoo! News,

Divorce letter from e-mail: jokes

Dear Wife:
I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving
you for good.
I’ve been a good man to you for seven years and I have
nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been
hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit
your job today and that was the last straw. Last week,
you came home and didn’t even notice that I had gotten a
new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a
brand new pair of silk boxers. You came home and ate in
two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching
all of your soaps.
You don’t tell me you love me anymore, you don’t want
sex anymore or anything. Either you’re cheating on me or
you don’t love me anymore, whatever the case is, I’m

Your EX-Husband
P. S. Don’t try to find me. Your SISTER and I are moving
away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Dear Ex-Husband:
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter.

It’s true that you and I have been married for seven
years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve
been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out
your constant whining and griping. Too bad that doesn’t

I did notice when you got a hair cut last week, the first
thing that came to mind was “You look just like a girl!”
but my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t
say anything nice.
And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have
gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped
eating pork seven years ago.

I turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers
on because the price tag was still on them. I prayed that
it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed
fifty dollars from me that morning ……. and your silk
boxers were $49.99!

After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we
could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit
the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and
bought us two tickets to Jamaica.

But…when I got home you were gone.

Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you
have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyers
said that with your letter that you wrote, you won’t get
a dime from me.

So take care.

Rich As Hell and Free!
P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this but Carla, my
sister, was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem.

Too bad that Lieberman never made it to the 2008 primaries, or will he,

  • Now it’s too easy to come in across our border. (Jul 2006)
  • Earn citizenship only after 11 years of waiting within rules. (Jul 2006)
  • One-time earned legalization for undocumented immigrants. (Jan 2004)
  • Make sure immigrants are treated fairly. (Jan 2004)
  • Unacceptable to allow Mexicans to die trying to immigrate. (Sep 2003)
  • Bush uses 9/11 as an excuse to avoid immigration reform. (Sep 2003)
  • Voted YES on establishing a Guest Worker program. (May 2006)
  • Voted YES on allowing illegal aliens to participate in Social Security. (May 2006)
  • Voted YES on giving Guest Workers a path to citizenship. (May 2006)
  • Voted NO on allowing more foreign workers into the US for farm work. (Jul 1998)
  • Voted YES on visas for skilled workers. (May 1998)
  • Voted YES on limit welfare for immigrants. (Jun 1997)

    Slap Contest Knockout

    Body: Martha recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home.

    Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the patio table.

    Then, while tracing her fingers in the ashes, she started talking to him….

    ‘Joe, you know that dishwasher you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money.

    She paused for a minute tracing her fingers in the ashes Then said, ‘Joe, remember that car you promised me? Well, I also bought it with the insurance money!’

    Again, she paused for a few minutes and while tracing her fingers in the ashes she said, ‘Joe, that diamond ring you promised me? I bought it too, with the insurance money!’

    Finally, still tracing her fingers in the ashes, she said, ‘Joe, remember that blow job I promised you?’

    ‘Here it comes…’

    Today’s Scripture *July 12, 2008*

    Leviticus 2:11
    No meat offering, which ye shall bring unto the LORD, shall be made with leaven: for ye shall burn no leaven, nor any honey, in any offering of the LORD made by fire.

    Why was no yeast allowed in the grain offerings?
    Yeast is a bacterial fungus or mold and is, therefore, an appropriate symbol for sin. It grows in bread dough just as sin grows in a life. A little yeast will affect the whole loaf, just as a little sin can ruin
    a whole life. Jesus expanded this analogy by warning about the “leaven of the Pharisees and Sadducess” (Matthew 16:6 Then Jesus said unto them, Take heed and beware of the leaven of the Pharisees and of the Sadducees. ; Mark 8:15 And he charged them, saying, Take heed, beware of the leaven of the Pharisees, and of the leaven of Herod. ).
    How do you visualize the effects of sin in your life? What do you do to eliminate sin from your attitudes and actions?

    Heavenly Father, we thank You for Your grace. We praise You for Your Holy Word to us.
    We humbly ask that You would show us any hidden sin in our lives that we need to eliminate!
    We want our attitudes and actions to be pleasing unto You. Our Lord, Our Savior!
    In Your Name, Amen..


    Please do not remove when forwarding
    Thank you & God Bless
    To be added to the daily mailings send an email to
    Then Today’s Scripture will be delivered to your email address–
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    Bible Scripture from the Authorized King James Version & Some information & ideas from NLT Life Application Bible ;
    all other accompanying thoughts & prayers ��April Hunt 2008

    Dear THALIA,

    Imagine yourself in a movie theater in the summer of 1988. The big budget movie you’re watching is an action film set in California 20 years from now. Big fires are burning out of control, and Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger calls in the National Guard to help put it out. The U.S. economy is in a slump and gas prices are over $4.00 per gallon. We are fighting a war in the Middle East just 7 years after terrorists attack us here at home by destroying the World Trade Center and damaging the Pentagon. Sounds like a typical fantasy movie from that era doesn’t it?

    Only this time it’s really happened!

    Kind of ironic isn’t it? Who would have thought 2008 would be as it is complete with high gas prices and an actor/bodybuilder now the Governor of California?

    Bad news aside, this should be a wakeup call to all of us: What we think is preposterous and impossible could in fact be probable.

    Now, let’s not try to visualize $10.00 per gallon gasoline and a war with Iran and China (too scary to think about if you ask me!) or anything negative. Why not apply the concept of dreaming the impossible for ourselves? Have you ever started to dream something really big only to pull back and tell yourself it’s too outlandish to imagine? I know I have. If you look at life as it is now though, you can see that most anything can happen – that’s just the way progress moves. Eventually, what seems impossible becomes yesterday’s news.

    This week, why not try dreaming some really BIG dreams. Imagine the big plans you have for yourself and then push it a few steps further. The good thing about having dreams is that they’ll become goals with just a little action. Let’s all see if we can position ourselves this week for some major breakthroughs in our future!

    Towards your Total Career Fitness!


    ps. Are you a project manager? If so, read below for a special opportunity that my friend Sean Kelly has for you:

    The SANS Institute’s MGT-525 Project Management and Effective Communication Course is a six day intensive training session being held September 13th – 18th, in Reston, VA. For registration information, please visit course.

    This Project Management and Effective Communications course will give you the tools to hone your communication skills and enable you to succeed in managing projects where quality, cost, and time are driving factors.

    Check out what a couple of the course’s previous participants have to say:

    “Sean has a great way of explaining unfamiliar concepts.” Paul Veillon, Wyle labs

    “Sean continues to do an excellent job. Obvious grasp on the material, and an effective communicator.” Chuck Kasinger, Raytheon

    For registration information, please visit course.

    Need to Write a Resume That’ll Land You Your Dream Job? Get my FREE 35 Page report How to Write a Winning Resume today at

    Malcolm O. Munro

    The Career Fitness Coach

    P.O. Box 1820 Germantown, MD 20875

    Toll Free: (866) 575-2231

    Metro/DC Area: (301) 576-0684

    Fax: (301)685-6312

    Visit me online at

    Just got a layoff notice? I can help! Get my 30 Day Career Jumpstart Program at

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